Note: I had been going through some old articles I had written awhile ago, and being that the place where they were originally published is now defunct, I am assuming that I have sole rights to my work. Some of the blog posts from before today were revamped from their original copies.This one is the original. Hope you at least smile.
Imagine, if you will, Shakespeare in his Elizabethan clothing, sitting at a desk with a candle, quill, ink and lots of paper before him. Now imagine,if you will, modern day Shakespeare, in blue jeans and a white polo shirt, with spiked purple hair, sitting at a messy computer console with a word processing program opened. Modern day Shakespeare is a romantic, and he writes mostly in Elizabethan English because he thinks that it's cool. Instead of writing long hand drafts of Romeo and Juliet, he now only has to have one draft because he has a SPELL CHECKER. With Spell Checker opened, the prologue of Romeo and Juliet now reads something like this:
Two horseholes both alike indigently
In far Verona, where we lay our sheen
From ancient fudge break to new mutivity
Where servile bloods make civil hands unclear
From fourth the fatal lions of these two hoes
A pear of tsar-cross'd lovers take their lime
Who's misadventured piteous overtones
Doo with their earth bury their parchments' strife
The tearful passage of their heath-mark'd lobe
And the continuance of their parents' cage
Witch, but their children's end, nought could remote
Is now the too hour's transfix of our stage
The which if ewe with parchment heirs attend
What here shallot miss, our moil shall strive to bend...